Ever been in your boyfriend’s/guy friend’s/random hookup’s bathroom and started sampling his dude beauty products?
Because I have.
And there ain’t no shame in this game because there are so many awesome men’s products out there–many with more refreshing, crisper scents than flowery women’s goods AND more powerful properties. Below are dude products that are totally okay to use in place of your own. (Although if you have a bathroom full of men’s stuff and a new guy comes over, he may get suspicious, so just keep that in mind.) If you live with your man, your best bet is to buy him this stuff as a gift. Little will he know it’s a gift to yourself.
Body Wash: Don’t get me wrong–I can appreciate a cucumber melon or lavender vanilla fragrance any day, but when I really need a pick-me-up in the shower, guys’ body washes are the ticket. Plus, dudes are dirtier in general, so their products are designed to work harder. I have been using Kiehl’s Cross-Terrain All-in-One Refueling Wash (“coconut-derived cleansers, soothing aloe vera, and an invigorating blend of menthol, vitamin E, and citrus oil, for a refreshing, tingling sensation and clean scent”) and I also love Jack Black’s Turbo Wash with rosemary, eucalyptus, and juniper berry, which is like a walk through a botanical garden. A solid, cheaper option is Nivea’s Platinum Protect 3-in-1 body wash in Citrus Explosion or Ocean Burst. An extra bonus: All these products pull double duty as shampoo. And now we know why guys take showers in record time…
Buy on Amazon: Jack Black Turbo Wash Energizing Cleanser for Hair and Body 10 fl oz
Face Wash: Don’t go trading in your girly cleanser (because it’s probably better at taking off makeup), but if you find yourself faced with a dude’s wash, give it a scrub on your mug, especially if it’s exfoliating (face wash manufacturers give guys a little extra grit, which we ladies can benefit from). Again, Kiehl’s and Jack Black have the creme de la creme, and Anthony’s glycolic facial cleanser is prime for smoothing your face and combatting fine lines (the glycolic acid is key). Plus, it comes in a massive 32-ounce bottle which may last you a year (maybe two). Neutrogena’s Invigorating Face Wash is a refresher for the record books–the foaming, cooling gel cleanses and wakes up dull skin.
Buy on Amazon: Anthony Logistics For Men Glycolic Facial Cleanser 8 oz
Razor: Let’s face it–women’s razors pretty much suck. They’re flimsier, the moisturizing pads are slimy, and the blades are more expensive (which is F’d up). Venus, you can preach nonsense about razors being designed for our “curves” but I’m not buying it. And every time you say “goddess,” I want to barf (save that for Anastasia Steele). I proudly use Gillette Fusion, but am intrigued by the new, special edition Fusion ProGlide, which has received rave reviews. And I’ve also heard good things about the Dollar Shave Club blades (if nothing else, the video is good for a giggle).
Buy on Amazon: Gillette Fusion Proglide Power Razor, 1-count Package
Shaving Gel/Cream: All of that Skintimate/Satin Care/Raspberry Rain/Luscious Floral Passion/Etc. marketing babble doesn’t do it for me (or my legs). The best shaving product I’ve ever used is Zirh–it’s a clear gel that goes on so ridiculously smooth and leaves your skin soft and fuzz-free, plus the aloe and glycerin keep you from drying out. On the drugstore side, Neutrogena’s Razor Defense shave gel is top-notch for your precious, sensitive skin.
Buy on Amazon: Zirh International Zirh By Zirh International For Men. Aloe Vera Shave Gel 100 Ml / 3.4-Ounces
Deodorant: I don’t want to diss ladies deodorant because there are great ones on the market, but men sweat more…hence, their anti-perspirants work harder. In the cooler seasons, it’s fine to stay with sticks “ph balanced just for her,” but if you need extra sweat protection when the heat is on, feel free to use guy’s deod, JUST as long as they’re unscented or have a unisex fragrance (no one is turned on by a chick who smells of Old Spice). Dove’s selections give long-lasting sweat-resistance (48 hours, they claim!) and come in a variety of fresh scents, plus the brand is known for its sensitive-skin-friendliness. I love Tom’s of Maine products and they just put out an awesome, hard-working, long-lasting men’s deodorant that’s ALL NATURAL (aluminum-free = no armpit cancer!). Or, if you’re fancy/high-maintenance like my friend Rob, you can take his suggestion and spring for Acqua Di Parma. His note to the ladies: “Yeah we get it. You went on study abroad and “lived” in Europe for six months. Stop yapping about it. This stuff smells good and cools down your pits. As a bonus, it’s made in Italy, so you’ll get to reminisce about that “slap and tickle” with Romeo you had while in Europe. Ladies, maybe you’ll walk a little taller knowing you’ve got your arm around a little bit of your Euro lover.” Can’t argue with that.
Buy on Amazon: Acqua di Parma Colonia Intensa Deodorant Stick
So go out and get your hands (and rest of your bod) on some guy’s bathroom goodies. They’re strong enough for him…but made just for you (to steal).
Where to buy in stores: Kiehl’s products at Kiehl’s stores and department stores; Jack Black at department stores (Bloomingdale’s, Nordstrom) and Sephora; Zihr at department stores; Acqua di Parma at department stores and Sephora; Dove/Neutrogena/Tom’s/Gilette at drug stores.