I have never lived with a dude (and not sure how I’m ever going to manage that), but I do live with a dog and lately I’ve been thinking that they’re probably pretty similar. Which got me thinking…having a dog is pretty similar to having a boyfriend/fiance/husband in general. Let’s take a look:
1. They will pee anywhere…anytime.
2. They leave hair everywhere with no plans to clean it up.
3. You want to snuggle with them 90 percent of the time. They want to snuggle with you about 40 percent of the time.
4. They could not be more annoyed when you try to snap pics of the two of you for Facebook/Twitter/Instagram.
5. You love them the most when they’re being quiet and/or sleeping.
6. You are convinced their farts smell way worse than what’s normal. And like, can you please get a warning every once in a while?
7. When you try to run with them, they’re so much faster and you always end up feeling like an out-of-shape a-hole.
8. When they wake you up early on a hungover Saturday/Sunday morning, you seriously think, “I just can’t do this anymore.”
9. They barely pay you attention all day, then you start getting ready and are running late…and they’re suddenly all up in your face.
10. They want to hump in the most inopportune times and places.
Now that’s true companionship.
Do you agree with these similarities? Or is my dog/guys I’ve dated just a special breed? Let me know with a comment if you have any more to add!
Have a great weekend, everyone! And if you DON’T have the responsibility of a dog and/or boyfriend, get out there and raise the woof.