Wow, what…an election. It was exciting to see everyone so hyped-up and anxious as Obama and Romney came neck-in-neck. Well, everyone except Diane Sawyer because she was wasted and Colorado’s entire population because they were high. Americans were so worried about Florida (which is basically like every other day, bless its heart) and Ohio became the most talked-about state in the country (enjoy it while it lasts, guys). Lots of HILARIOUS Facebookers and Tweeters felt this the perfect opportunity to use the ol’ “Once you go black, you never go back” adage about our country (OMG ROFLMFAO!), and Fox News literally became the Lindsay Lohan of news stations. This entry is going to be short (and I promise we’ll get back to the girly goods tomorrow) because I stayed up ’til the wee hours obsessing over all this election biz-nass on the Internet and I’m on the ol’ boob tube bright and early. It’s just a good thing I’m on CBS and not FOX. I probably wouldn’t make it out alive.
November 7, 2012 — Ashley Hesseltine