Listen, America. My 30th birthday is in 5 days and here you are, trying to overshadow my milestone with your barbecues, fireworks, road races, and drunk people. But don’t you think for one second that I won’t have all of those things (in some capacity) at my birthday. ESPECIALLY the drunk people. (And the road race might be a 2 a.m. stumble.)
But HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY anyway, everyone! Unfortunately, due to the torrential downpours and flood warning, I won’t be wearing my gown this year.
I’ll save it for MY birthday.
Seriously though…hope everyone has a great 4th! Atlantans, try not to drown.