Guess what? I am REALLY into the World Cup. I enjoy watching the sport, and I’m invested because it’s our country playing against the WORLD and we’re advancing. It’s exhilarating. I like the camaraderie of watching with friends in a bar, but I had to admit, I probably liked the game I watched by myself on my couch even more because I could see every play without distraction (“Yes, I’ll have another vodka; oh shit I missed a goal!”), hear commentary and interesting stats, and really ogle the players focus.

Do I watch soccer regularly (read: any other time aside from the World Cup or maybe a big game here and there)?

Nope.

And SO FUCKING WHAT?

I am so sick of people hating on Americans’ “new love” for soccer, using the term “bandwagon fans,” and being snarky with Facebook statuses like “Since when did everyone love soccer?”

Haters: Get over yourselves. We’re enjoying being AMERICAN, cheering on our (hot) home team, and watching competitive matches. And maybe some people don’t really care about the sport but just want to go to a bar and partake in the festivities and then they get excited (BECAUSE IT’S EXCITING) and post something about it on social media, then by default are the “bandwagon soccer fans” you’re mocking. Again, WHO CARES?

As for cunts folks like Ann Coulter bashing the sport in general: You truly sound like an idiot (albeit the article was well-written and meant to push buttons, but still). If you don’t enjoy soccer, that’s fine. I don’t enjoy baseball (OHMYGOD, I’M SO UN-AMERICAN), but I would never degrade it as a sport. Soccer takes so much skill, intelligence, TEAMWORK (hello?) and more endurance than most other sports (have you happened to notice how much they run?). I played for three years in high school and wasn’t good. You know why? Because it’s hard.

On top of that, in Ann’s cringe-worthy article, she says: The prospect of either personal humiliation or major injury is required to count as a sport. Oh. My bad. I thought it was about athleticism and competitiveness. I doubt most athletes got into sports because they were just dying for personal humiliation or major injury. But I guess this abrasive bitch is the authority on ALL SPORTS and what can qualify as one.
Leading Conservatives, Presidential Candidates Speak At CPAC Gathering
(And for the record, I would think if a goalkeeper let one slide by him with 10 seconds left on the lock, losing the game for his team, that might be slightly humiliating. Call me crazy!)

She also says: If more ‘Americans’ are watching soccer today, it’s only because of the demographic switch effected by Teddy Kennedy’s 1965 immigration law. I promise you: No American whose great-grandfather was born here is watching soccer. One can only hope that, in addition to learning English, these new Americans will drop their soccer fetish with time.

And this gem: Any growing interest in soccer can only be a sign of the nation’s moral decay.

Yes. That’s DEFINITELY a telltale sign of our morally decaying nation. Not parents murdering their children, mass shootings on the reg, the epidemic of teen bullying, or the popularity of the Kardashians.

I’m sure she’s going for shock value (that Beyonce jab did not go unnoticed either) but girl, just stop. Take your Adam’s apple and go hang out with Nancy Grace.

I think it’s a beautiful thing the US is embracing this UNIVERSAL SPORT. Haters can hate and Ann can wait around for one of her favorite athletes (if she has any) to get personally humiliated or majorly injured, but I’ll be over here cheering for our team.

#IBelieveThatWeWillWin,
Ashley

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