Because I know how to Ask Jeeves, I discovered that there are a handful of other “LOL FUNNIEST INSTAGRAMS TO FOLLOW” articles out there, but fuck them because this is the best one, I fucking promise you that. (That was a test. If you’re offended by my language, this article probably isn’t for you.)
Before we start, I’m not including @TheFatJewish and @FuckJerry on the actual list because if you’re not one of the 93249749879872876375247 people following them by now, WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR LIFE? Same with @Unspirational (plus I featured them here).
Moving right along.
1. @TextsFromYourEx. I thought about saving this ’til the end, but couldn’t. This is 100% my favorite Instagram account that has ever existed. I laugh and I laugh and I laugh and I think about my exes and I laugh harder.
2. @YouDidNotEatThat. This glorious account captures the worst women on the planet: Those who pose with food for Instagram but don’t eat it. The basic bitches giving bloggers a bad name. The ladies you look at and instinctively punch your smart phone.
I literally hate that girl. Also, they find historical moments like this:
3. @ThatLooksLikeADick. Exactly what it sounds like. Double takes for days.
4. @SlutWhisperer. Yes, the name appears to be misogynistic, but let him explain…
5. @_Eavesdropper. A new fave of mine. Statements overheard on the streets of New York, amazingly displayed sans context in fancy-pants script. Genius.
6. @GirlWithNoJob. Just stumbled on this gem whilst tumbling down the Instagram rabbit hole and am liking her style. Her bio is: “My dream job is not needing one.” I can respect that. She also makes fun of the Kardashians a lot. I can respect that even more.
7. @KanyeDoingThings. Looking at Kanye’s smug-fugly face in any situation makes me want to stab myself in the eye and move to a deserted island, but this Instagram makes it bearable. So thank you @KanyeDoingThings for my entertainment and unharmed vision.
8. @Trevso_Electric. I’ll let him explain why you might like his Instagram as he recently told me:
I mean yeah. He’s got good shit.
9. @TinderConvos. For the record, some of these real-life Tinder convos are gross and offensive and make you lose faith in the male species……..but some of them are pure gold:
Also, the BEST PICKUP LINE OF ALL TIME:Brennan, I literally love you and hope we swipe right on each other one day.
10. @KidsAreTheWorst. They said it, not me.
11. @Betches. And not basic ones.
(PS, I love all the girls tagging their ratchet friends in this one.)
12. @PassengerShaming. Real-life flight attendants and passengers sneaking pics of assholes on planes for our entertainment. There is a God.
Oh, and one more for good measure……yours truly. (Come on, you knew that was coming.)
(And that gem above was just featured in Buzzfeed, nbd.)
Happy double tapping, y’all.
Hope you all get some giggles from these, and please tell me your favorites in the comments! I know I got all cocky saying this list was the HOLY GRAIL OF LOLers, but I know there are so many other gems out there. Let a sister know! And thanks to everyone who gave me awesome suggestions for this piece.