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So this Alexander Wang x H&M collection is a pretty big deal. Not only is Alexander Wang such a major name (especially as of late), but this marks the first time an American designer has teamed up with H&M in a designer collaboration. Personally I don’t know how I feel about the collection because this was my first taste of it a few months ago and now it’s all I can have nightmares about think of:

rihanna alexander wang

That has to be the single most unflattering outfit I have EVER witnessed. GRAY, camel-toe-inducing leggings with a CREW NECK, full-belly-baring crop top. Not to mention the horizontal stripes. And especially NOT TO MENTION the fact that the elastic bands look very tight, which means…you guessed it…muffin top AND a bonus ribcage roll.

I mean, clearly if anyone can pull it off, it’s Rihanna but she is probably a size 0 (2 on a bad day) and even she doesn’t look that awesome. I’d also like to know how much Wang paid her to step outside and walk down the street in that shit because EVERY SINGLE MAGAZINE AND GOSSIP BLOG picked it up. I’m going to go with $8 trillion. I digress.

There’s a promo video counting down to the collection launch on November 6 (in select stores) and it’s basically a movie trailer. It’s “video game-inspired” with a Diplo original as the soundtrack, shot in an underground theatre in London. There are a bunch of supermodels, plus hot-AF soccer star Andy Carroll in it, but all I could focus on was Joan Smalls and her unfair perfection. They probably wanted Rihanna in it, but they couldn’t afford it since they already spent 3/4 of their 2014 budget having her wear that God-awful outfit in public and sit front row at Fashion Week. But most importantly, this video reminds me of Mortal Kombat and the days my brother and I would go head-to-head on our Super Nintendo. I beat him a lot since I was older, smarter (because I was older), and he was scared of me because I was a psycho irrational loose cannon from from age 10-11. Whatever.

Here’s the vid:

I’ll pass on the cheap-looking puffy coat, but I might need that beanie. I’ll fight someone for it.

LYLAS,
Ashley

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