Since I’m on my phone 94.7% of the time, I get excited about new technology/tricks/apps/etc. (STILL WAITING ON THAT DAMN TACO EMOJI BTW), but it takes a lot to get me REALLY worked up. But Snapchat’s new Discover feature has me giddy as a wine drunk Bachelor contestant on a helicopter date. It launched yesterday […]

The weather in Atlanta has been so depressing this week all I want to do is curl up under my comforter, listen to mood music, drink red wine until I pass out, and not wake up until it’s 70 and sunny. Unfortunately, I have a job (ish) and I’m not drinking for another week (more on […]

Confession: I have been watching The Bachelor for most my adult life and I’m not ashamed. There is literally no better show to view with friends, critique, and live tweet. Sure, seasons have had their fair share of snoozy moments, but they still never disappoint with the handpicked crop of insecure/narcissistic/batshit/desperate females, Chris Harrison’s billionaire […]

#NewYear……#NewYou. How about we put aside your unrealistic resolutions of quadrupling your income, getting Gisele’s body or Ryan Gosling’s face, and finding love on FarmersOnly.com and talk about what really matters: Your social media accounts. Our old pal Trey and I have long discussed how social media is completely out of control (yet we spend […]

There is nothing quite like dad fashion–Wranglers and New Balances, Crocs and socks, khakis and windbreakers, Canadian tuxedos, Hawaiian shirts (in the middle of winter)–there are no limits when it comes to their personal style and comfort. When I’m home from the holidays, I alway eagerly anticipate what kind of ensemble my dad is going […]

I remember the moment I saw an enlarged Emoji on Snapchat. It was last Tuesday night; I sat up straight in bed and knew my life was changed forever. This are few things I love more in this world than Emojis and when they’re larger than life, I LITERALLY CAN’T EVEN. The number one reason […]

GIRLS. LOVE. INSTAGRAM. The only thing girls love more than cupcakes, coffee, Emojis, new outfits, and skinny pictures of themselves are putting cupcakes, coffee, Emojis, new outfits, and skinny pictures of themselves on Instagram, so according to my genius deductive reasoning skills, that means they literally love Instagram more than anything else in the entire universe. As for […]

Remember when Nicki Minaj put out her “Anaconda” video and it was awful and had a bunch of random shit in it like pineapples on turntables and and we were like, This is awful and this random shit just makes it awful-er. Remember when J.Lo put out a video shaking her lubed-up ass with Iggy […]

Guaranteed you’ve been that girl or been in a conversation with that girl who’s like, “Ugh, I just wish there was a penis Emoji!” Like hell you do. Most girls don’t even like getting real dick pics. Why would we want tiny, cartoon dick pics splashed across our iPhone screens? No thanks. But we ladies do […]

Am I tripping on psychedelic mushrooms or is there a Snowpocalypse in Saudi Arabia right now because this blog entry is about Taylor Swift…and it’s positive. FML. I’m not one to excessively celebrity gossip (that’s for bores and basics), but you may know I used to majorly hate on Taylor Swift. I could not stand her […]

Welp. The collection dropped this morning and H&M’s site is already down. Wang down! I repeat, Wang down. What? Anyway, this “sporty couture” collection is badass (in theory) and no doubt I would love to see a runway show of these fashions with some hard-hitting EDM or hip-hop as the soundtrack (this tune, for example), but […]

Fireball was that perfect guy who always lived in your city but you never knew existed. He was around, but you were too busy making out with Jose, Jim, Jack, or Goose, or partying with your red-headed slut friends to notice. But then finally in 2013 (or maybe it was 2012, you can’t really remember), […]

Everywhere you look (Facebook, MySpace, you mom’s Tinder profile), you see someone turning up with their bae and other people saying they LITERALLY CAN’T EVEN if they hear the word bae one more time, and the rest of the universe is either sitting around taking basic Buzzfeed quizzes and drinking #PSLs or looking at “fitness […]

Even though I knew this was coming the second I heard the question, it still made my jaw drop then start laughing hysterically. Poor Peter (and of course that’s his name). But props to him for taking it in stride. But still. I just don’t know how you come back from this.

If “Anaconda” comes on the radio, I immediately turn the station. If the video comes on MTV, I immediately change the channel. JK LOL like MTV actually plays music videos LMAO! But seriously…can’t stand the “song,” obviously can’t take the video (remember?), but this dance school performing choreography by Tricia Miranda (my new idol), might […]

I went to Sam Smith at The Tabernacle on Monday night, and I will share with the world that it was one of the most incredible concerts I’ve ever been to in my life (seriously). But what it made it even BETTER were all the people in front of me with their phones in the […]

I never even DREAMED this day would come, but my favorite comedic sketch of all time (along with every other white girl I know) has not only turned into a song we can #TurnUp whilst drinking white zin and taking mirror selfies before going out on Saturday night, but also…A MUSIC VIDEO. Starring Sara (with no H) […]

Because I know how to Ask Jeeves, I discovered that there are a handful of other “LOL FUNNIEST INSTAGRAMS TO FOLLOW” articles out there, but fuck them because this is the best one, I fucking promise you that. (That was a test. If you’re offended by my language, this article probably isn’t for you.) Before […]

Yeah yeah yeah, spring and summer are legit, but let’s be honest—fall is the best season because dudes have NFL, NCAA, and fantasy football, and chicks have EVERYTHING WE LIVE FOR. Am I wearing leggings and UGG slippers as I type this? I mean, does Obama drink lattes? Here are ten reasons to raise a glass […]

I loved my summer 2K14 playlist so much, I wondered if I’d ever be able to top it. WELL. Thanks to Spotify’s killer music browsing abilities, a little Flywheel instructor stalking (read: Cara Weaver), all the talented music makers out right now, and my own penchant for playlisting, I may have just done it. There […]

Jennifer Lopez’s “Booty” video is out, and I didn’t think this was possible, but it has MORE ASS THAN THE “ANACONDA” VIDEO. There are no pineapples spinning on record players, pink hand weights, or Drake’s boner; just J. Lo and I.G.G.Y’s ass cheeks, a lot of lube (plus EOS lip balm because product placement?), and a […]

Y’all know how I feel about Nicki Minaj’s “Anaconda” video (and her desperate antics in general). And that horrendous song–every time it comes on the radio, I turn the station. It has become Nickelback to me. This parody by Bart Baker give zero fucks about dissing the song, video, Nicki’s talents, and that fat ass. […]

I’m just going to say it. It kinda’ blows my mind that beauty pageants still exist in 2014. It’s hard for me to wrap my head around the fact that females choose to dedicate their formative years to participating in contests where they are judged on how they look in bikinis and prom dresses, average […]

There’s been a lot of talk about being “basic” lately, specifically being a “basic bitch.” I read the Buzzfeed article “25 Things All Basic White Girls Do in the Fall” and well, I thought it was dumb as f*ck. I mean, did you just copy this from some “shit girls like” list and put “basic and […]