Back in April/May, I decided that this was going to be ASHLEY’S SUMMER OF FUN. The first few months of the year were total shit not great for me personally and I didn’t take any vacations, so by the time June rolled around, I was so ready to GTFO of my depression town. To kick off my two […]

Unless you were one of those unicorn children with a perfectly polished stay-at-home and/or overbearing mother who made sure your hair was always on point from birth ’til now (and is probably still meddling), you had at least one to six periods in your life when your hair was an absolute WTF disaster…ESPECIALLY if you […]

****Guest post from Allison of AA**** You guys. I have to tell you about my night.  It is currently 10:42 p.m. and I am sitting at my kitchen table; the exact spot I was sitting in at approximately 9:30 p.m. when I first saw it.   I’LL START FROM THE BEGINNING. I took a later […]

In the Walking Dead meets Pet Semetary twist of the century, a cat named Bart was hit by a car and pronounced dead (you know, because he was lying lifeless in a pool of blood), so the owner buried him, then five days later, he clawed himself out of the grave and showed up on the […]

I know a thing or two about relationships, not because I have been in a bunch of serious ones, but because I was born with a rare gift to offer sage wisdom and advice that I can’t actually apply to my own life. What…..a #blessing. That, coupled with my 839792742947 girl and guy friends who come […]

I love Halloween. Like, really really (add 12 more reallys) love it. When you were little, it was an excuse to get dressed up, get attention, act silly with your friends, and eat candy until you passed out. Now it’s an excuse to get dressed up, get attention, act silly with your friends, and drink […]

***Guest post by Lynsey of Sugar Free Ear Candy*** My most innocent girlfriend called me the other day and asked if she should get a Brazilian wax. Before I could begin laughing at the mere thought of her taking her monogrammed panties off in front of a stranger to get her virginal crotch ripped to […]

Did you read Part 1 and Part 2? Rob did bring me a coffee (because he values his life), and in an attempt to make up for the abandonment, he had Dewey written on the cup, which is not only the name of my dog (who you may know from Instagram), but also our next […]

My friend and favorite bartender (besides my brother) at the best bar/restaurant in the Universe (The Starboard in Dewey Beach) came out earlier this year and wrote a simple, heartfelt, humorous, perfect post on Facebook about it, which got nearly 1,000 likes (bet that’s more than any engagement/baby/new job/#blessed post you’ve seen in your newsfeed […]

I worry that someday it’s going to come out that Kind bars’ nutritional labels are wrong and they really are packed with calories and sugar (Kalteen Bar-style), because I just can’t understand how they are THAT GOOD and still good for you. It’s safe to say I have a unhealthy healthy obsession with these gems. They’re […]

I had just broken things off with my long-distance, on-again-off-again boyfriend and was driving 7 hours back to Atlanta on a good 45 minutes of sleep (when you know you’re having “the talk” in the morning, it doesn’t make for the best shut-eye). In other words, I was thisclose to dousing myself in gasoline at […]

This weekend, I did not have one drink. And no, I was not in jail, rehab, or a dry county. I did not go out, put makeup on, wear anything without an elastic waistband, and barely interacted with people. And I loved it. What…a loser. Mind you, I had my weekend on Wednesday with the […]

I was leaving Atlanta’s “swankiest and sexiest” nightlife establishment, Privé, on Saturday night (obviously I was leaving; that place is awful) when I was approached by a homeless man, who asked me for money to buy food at the nearby Publix. I had an Uber car two seconds away and no cash on me (shocker), […]

While I was drinking Europe dry traveling last week, I re-posted an article I wrote a year prior about my mortifying vibrator incident in London’s Heathrow airport. Well the Internet (and self-pleasure) Gods were smiling on me because a few days later, I received this email: I mean…if you ever get an email that says […]

Why do girls cry about everything? Could someone please explain this phenomenon to me? I don’t mean just once in a while like I do, but all the time. Now, I can understand when ol’ girl catches her amazing-soulmate-boyfriend tongue kissing another man he met at QuickTrip, but I’m talking about the smallest occurrences in […]

I was 7 or 8 years old (read: at least 5 years out of potty training), and I had just put on a brand new outfit and was getting ready to go outside and play. By outfit, I mean a monochromatic sweatsuit (this particular one was pink) because apparently, those were my jam when I […]

As our friend Tom so eloquently stated, “Halloween was designed for hooking up. This is a holiday where you can rely on your costume to draw attention instead of your boring personality and average looks.” Add alcohol into this mix and you have people getting down with members of the opposite sex (or same sex […]

Hey gals. Your new bestie Tom here. I want to give you a smidge of advice and share the story of how the most attractive girl on this sweet Earth rejected me when I asked her out, BUT made feel like a million bucks at the same time. Now, you might not know this, but rejection […]

I have a confession. Yesterday…on day 4 of the 5-day juice cleanse…I cheated. I had to come clean to my partner in juicing crime… You guys, when the coffee was brewing and the smell hit my nostrils, I really did feel like my 19-year-old self getting into a bar with my fake ID and catching […]

Halfway through Day 2 and I’m still alive and have not started hallucinating yet OR eyeing Dewey’s food with envy. In fact, I’m actually feeling pretty good (and I hear Days 3-5 are even better). BUT, I want a cup of coffee so badly that I had to put my Keurig in my coat/costume closet […]

If you can believe it, I was quite the demanding (and too smart for my own good) child. So when I was about to enter first grade (GRADE SCHOOL, BITCHES!), that meant it was time for a grownup hairdo, which in 1989, was obviously a perm (or a “permanent” as the salon professionals would say). […]

The recently viral video below inspired me to write a piece I’ve been sitting on since June. Take a look (warning: you might feel a little sad), and then read on… Unsettling, right? Let me begin… In 2010, when I was debating agonizing over quitting my public relations job (and steady paycheck) to pursue writing […]