So, Esquire named Mila Kunis The Sexiest Woman Alive for 2012. SHOCKER.

Not only is she smokin’ hot, but she’s actually cool and funny, so good luck trying to top this one next year, guysWatch this video of her sexiness in action and please, ladies, don’t feel bad about yourselves. You would look that amazing if you had a hair and makeup team, Hollywood airbrush tanning, perfect lighting, photographers directing your every move, Ashton Kutcher to fantasize about, etc.

Sigh. She might actually be perfect. But you can easily slip into sexy Mila mode with these five things (and not one of them is a copy of 50 Shades of Grey).

1. The makeup: The future Mrs. Kutcher (sorry, Demi) rocks a softer version of the smoky eye, which is great news because A) Full-on smoky eye is difficult for the average person to achieve, and B) It can turn into scary eye by 1 a.m. Too Faced has answered our prayers with the Natural At Night Sexy & Sultry Neutral Eye Shadow Collection ($36) complete with how-to cards so you really can’t F it up (can I get an amen?!). Don’t have patience for a palette? Pick up Bobbi Brown’s Long-Wear cream shadow in Stone ($24) or L’oreal’s Infallible eye shadow in Bronzed Taupe ($8)—you won’t have quite the same dramatic effect, but you’ll score a noticeable, all-over richness. And don’t forget your eyeliner (a chocolaty brown looks best) and mascara. Once your peepers are all come-hither-like, you need a glossy, nude lip. Clearly, I’m choosing Nars’ pearly Striptease ($24), or for the slightest tint of color, the peachy pink Orgasm (you won’t have to fake this). I also love Victoria’s Secret Shiny Kiss flavored lip gloss in Slice of Heaven or Mocktail Hour ($9)—they go on smooth and shimmery and are obviously made for making out (in case that’s on your agenda).

2. Tousled, voluminous hair. You could get a blowout (at Drybar, ask for The Mai Tai with extra volume). Or you could use a bunch of volumizing products before styling. But if you’re dealing with dry, styled hair and need a quick fix, turn your head upside down and blow dry the roots for a full minute or two. Stand up and lightly finger comb your locks to tame them, also using your fingertips to tousle the hair at the crown. Feel free to take small chunks and really tease them with your brush or fine-tooth comb (the more volume the better–it will fall as the day/night goes on). If that doesn’t give you enough of the sexy bed head you want, Oscar Blandi makes an incredible texture and volume spray to use on dry hair. At the end of this tease-fest, you can apply a smoothing serum to the tips if they need a l’il shine and/or taming.

3. Black, lacy underthings. Every gal needs some (if you don’t have any, you better hightail it to the mall during lunch/after work). Cosabella makes sexy, comfortable, lacy pieces in all kinds of styles (check out the Never Say Never collection)–a pair of cheeky, hot pants and a good bra (or bustier if you really want to spice it up) is all you need. Victoria’s Secret new unlined lace bras feel like you’re almost not wearing anything at all (score!). And Hanky Panky just got a little naughty with its peek-a-boo bralette and panties. Even if you’re wearing jeans and a T-shirt (a white one if you’re not modest), you’ll feel like the super sexy kitten you are with black, lacy lingerie underneath. Meow.

4. The soundtrack. Half the reason that video is so seductive is the music. Take a moment and picture it to the tune of “Gangnam Style.” Ew. Whether you want to get sexy with a gentleman caller, before a date, or home alone attempting to take racy pics of yourself in black lingerie (always good to have on file), you need the right tunes. The song in the Esquire video is “Bright Lights” by Gary Clark, Jr. Other artists/bands that do the trick: The Black Keys, Lana Del Rey, Otis Redding, and of course…Usher. I created a Spotify playlist called The Mood that starts with “Bright Lights” and some striptease-y/set the vibe jams, then moves into softer, “let’s get it on” territory. Click HERE  to get it or play below (use the little arrow to skip to the next song):

5. A smile.
It’s the most important thing you can wear. Bedroom eyes, come hither looks, and pouty lips certainly have their place, but the sexiest females don’t take themselves too seriously, even in bedroom situations (you’ll notice Mila’s pearly whites and genuine laugh make appearances in the video). I watched Esquire‘s video of Minka Kelly from 2010 and she alternated between seductive smirk and orgasm face the entire time. I mean, come on, girl. You’re rolling around on a furry rug touching yourself while a team of people surround you. You don’t see the humor in that at all?

So go on…grin and bare it.


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  1. Great post! The smile and music are the best part…all you need and doesn’t cost you a thing. good stuff


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