Well Anastasia Steele hosted SNL on Saturday night (sans being whipped and handcuffed…I think?) and while I haven’t watched the whole thing yet (GET IT TOGETHER, ON DEMAND), I saw this one sketch and wanted to yell “YAAAASSSSS” from my balcony. But I settled for giggling on my couch.
Too many times women hold back because they’re afraid of hurting someone’s feelings or seeming like a bitch. But this video encourages us to be #Brave and SAY WHAT YOU WANNA SAY. Tell your co-worker you don’t want to hang outside the office, steal someone’s cookie, put the cheap friend on blast at dinner, make someone leave the damn bathroom so you can take care of your business in peace.
Warning: Breaking Bad spoiler alert at 3:14 if you’re one of the four people (myself included) who hasn’t see the show.
To recap…7 things you should ALWAYS SAY:
1. “We’re not friends and we’re never going to hang out, so I’m going to go away now.”
2. “I’m not coming to your birthday party and you’ll probably never see me outside of work unless you come to my house.”
3. “(Insert name here) didn’t put in enough for dinner. She’s being cheap and she always does this.”
4. “No I don’t want to split this cookie with you. I want you to give me the whole thing.”
5. “I’m sorry, I’ve known you for a very long time and I don’t know your name.” (Says name.) “Wait I’m sorry, I just completely forgot again. When you were saying it, I wasn’t even listening!”
6. “I actually don’t care what you’re talking about and I never will.”
7. “Excuse me, I can’t poop while you’re in here and I know you’re just doing your hair, so I’m gonna need you to GET THE FUCK OUT.”
I wanna see you be brave.
*PS this is comedy and saying some of these things as demonstrated in the sketch might get you in trouble at work or in life, but still let it be an inspiration to you when your natural instinct is to hold back. Remember, you can stand up for yourself without being a “bitch.”