If there’s ONE thing that matters in life, it’s getting the perfect selfie. I mean, people literally die trying.

And the selfie stick is fine (I mean, Melissa McCarthy used one at a Spy screening this week and I was front and center, nbd)….
But these contraptions can be a tad obtrusive. There has to be a better way…

Enter: Selfie Shoes (NOT an April Fool’s joke).

Simple instructions: Just insert your phone into the port at the front of either your right or left shoe, raise it to the perfect angle and click the internal button with a tap of your toe (wait really??) to take the photo.
Because you don’t look cool enough when you stop everything to take a selfie, now you will be doing a damn high-kick in a heinous, square-toed heel, too. This is especially fun when you’re wearing a dress so the world can see your hoo-ha while you attempt to nail the perfect duck face for Instagram. And I hate to say it, but I know a few guys who are going to be pissed they only make a women’s shoe right now.

Sigh. I miss the 90s when we wore Sketchers without phone ports and used disposable Kodaks to capture life’s moments. But I have to admit, the first time I see someone wearing these disasters and taking a selfie, I am going to lose my shit, so carry on narcissistic fashionistas.

Let the leg stretching begin,

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